Thank you for writing this. More and more people are finding out. More and more people know that we have to come together to really do something about it. By being in it with one another, by building beautiful solutions together, by coming into true presence with one another.
After most of this past decade doing "Rescue Aid In Hell" — community crisis care ballooned beyond imagining by the sheer and horrific invisibility of what living beings endure at intersections of compounded medical negligence, incompetence, malfeasance, abusive professional context (as in, wow are professionals being abused in their workplaces!), and predatory commerce — we notice again and again that more voices are rising.
And there is something in us that is far more powerful than the forces of inertia and decay that would keep that status quo in place.
There are masses more of us in this together than we've even recognized yet. There's a tidal convergence. We're being carried into a big change, and all of us are needed.
It’s such a hard topic to talk about. I know you understand it very well based on our conversations, which “ironically” crossed my mind a few days before I published this.
I’ve dealt with the abysmal (abyss?) whirpool this system is so much, and for differing reasons, that I often hesitate to rehash those stories because in all honestly, I still dont feel like im “back to normal” with my health, even after 10+ years of when I decided to go that route to get help for health things.
Not to knock people who do surgeries or emergency medicine when needed, but in all other respects, more often than not, the treatment protocols given, in my experience, have exacerbated the situation or created issues where there weren’t any. Again I know you are all too familiar with this.
A new way of healing is called for, clearly. Only way I survived the last round was by fighting like hell for years on end. I’ll have to do it again but this time I won’t do it to the degree where it consumes my life. I have to return back to the simpler things I think. Hopefully this made sense, brain is still kinda foggy.
Much love to you and your community of people all going through this shit. I hope we get to meet in person one day.
There is something so incomparably powerful, I find, about wherever people experiencing these things can share really honestly about it and feel heard and recognized, feel the sense of the collective body waking to awareness of it and maintaining a consistent awareness of it, and leaning in to know the circumstance better in order to facilitate a collective response.
Having to hide what one is experiencing, having to veil what's really happening, it shuts the living body down in so many ways. It feels to me that the individual body needs to know that a collective response is possible, and it activates new functions. Pleomorphisms.
Even if that collective response is just that more and more of us know, and we remember, and we are looking out for one another. That we are not ignoring or trying to pretend away these situations. That we know that these things are happening in one another's lives — and the more awareness we have about it, the more we can suddenly realize our capacity for collaborative strategy in it. Miracles that happened just because we stayed with one another in it in whatever way we could.
So I am always looking to find who can talk about this, who is willing to share what they're experiencing about it, who is anchoring honorable human energetics for the ways we can co-create and tend community bodies that recognize this.
I have found that kind of relational contact to be so life-saving and regenerative for me and others. It's so full of vitality, that presencing and tending in recognition and relationship with one another, I think that carries the biggest healing and the biggest reparative capacities. It makes everything else work better. And sometimes it's the thing that works when nothing else does.
I feel really deeply that the more we build that, the more we will have exactly what we need, whatever that happens to be.
Yes — I so want to meet you in person one day. ✨💖✨ Thank you for your kind words. And blessings to all of this! 🙏🏼🕊️🌿
No...MD stands for Master of Death. You might look into DMSO as something for pain. I have not used it but have read good things about it.
It's a bit confusing as you say you have family members who are medical professionals and then you say there are some good doctors who really want to help people. Perhaps you have considered asking a family member for support. Seems like that would be a logical step.
I don't blame you for not trusting doctors as the system can be infuriating. And for sure many insurance companies are the pits. You might be able to find a holistic type doctor in your area and one that takes cash. I did this with my wife and her hip problems instead of having the recommended hip surgery. The results have been pretty good.
Thank you. I haven’t heard of DMSO so I will look into that. And yes, it can be very confusing and complicated on an additional level for the reason you mentioned here, the system as a whole is wildly fucked, but I have also seen those little glimpses, where truly, even in a busted system.. the light of the person who happens to also be a physician can make a big difference to the good.
It is unfortunate, because they are often blocked from doing so. Usually they’re more at liberty when in their own private practice. I hear and see this all the time. It’s rough. I wouldn’t be able to be in that system, I’d probably get into an actual fight with a hospital exec day one. And then of course, there are the ones, just like in any other “field”, where they blindly follow orders — although these orders, when blindly follow, can be fatal. Often they are. Stakes are much higher than someone who works at a grocery store.
But, I will cease my complaining. I’ll look into what you have said. And yes, I will be taking the healing in a different direction and hopefully connecting with a holistic practitioner here. Thank you for your share here. And I am glad your wife was able to find relief for what she was going through. 🙏
This is brilliantly written and also heartbreakingly true. Thank you for your persistence, your art, and your divine humanity! And thank you for acknowledging that there are providers who do actually care(I am one). We are in this together. I pray you find some relief from your pain soon, in the way that is best for *you*.
Thank you for saying something!!!! And thank you for being in the field of medicine and being one who cares. Given the things I’ve heard (and seen) from physicians, nurses, etc, I know it is not easy to be in your shoes at all. Thank you. <3
I despise the medical system in the US. It’s horrible, and frankly, it’s worse in Florida. My brother was addicted to opioids and after my parents paid for him to go to rehab twice, after the second time 8 years ago, my father drove him to Connecticut the day after he got out to live with me temporarily so he could get away from all the people and corrupt doctors who were writing prescriptions like candy. He is still here, and thriving now as a real estate agent because my little farm house in the woods helped him heal. He knows how lucky he is to have a supportive family, most of his friend’s families had disowned them. One of the biggest reasons I believe in you and support your work, Tess, is that you know that we can and do recover. More people need this mindset.
I am ANA positive, which means I have the autoimmune antibodies but have not been able to get a diagnosis. I flare up in pain and get very tired, especially when under stress. Thing with autoimmune diseases is that there is no “autoimmune doctor” so all the “specialists” just keep pointing at eachother because no one knows the answer. Mickey Trescott has a good cook book for recipes that help decrease flare ups and chronic fatigue symptoms. Being ANA positive has made me learn how to take care of myself, and I’m still learning.
I hear your pain, and I hope you can find the peace you need. I would love to talk to you about AI sometime, I don’t think it’s as scary as you do, but I understand that we fear the unknown. It’s a powerful tool, like a knife, it can be used for great good or bad deeds.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I am also quite frustrated with the florida docs, however I've lived several states... I've had hellacious healthcare in Oregon as well, not sure where it's good. But I believe you, if I remember correctly, you're from the area I live in, gulf coast right?
I am so glad your brother got out and has you and your family in his life. It's a tragedy when families disown one another because of these issues (or any really).
The ANA positive - thank you for sharing that. So, I am dealing with something similar. A certain antibody associated with an "umbrella" autoimmune condition keeps coming up positive, but they cannot figure out exactly what it is or why.
I would be very interested in speaking with you about the cook book because the pain I've dealt with for such a long time absolutely flares up with certain psychological stressors / triggers.
Definitely down to talk about AI as well. Where I come from regarding AI is numerous prophecies around it that go back thousands of years, plus observing how it is used in real time, plus knowing who created it and what their motives were and still are.
I suppose it could be used for the good, but the people who currently control it are not interested in that. It's an incredibly powerful technology and I don't think the current level of consciousness on this planet is ready for it. Same reason why I wouldn't hand a grenade to a toddler.
However, I'm open to hearing your thoughts on the matter, I'd actually appreciate hearing another perspective. I'll message you my #.
I cannot imagine a system so screwed that you are judged on the type of insurance you have instead of the healing you need. What is wrong with these people? I hope you do find your way to healing. It won’t be through medical doctors. It’ll be through your own spiritual journey. I hope you find relief soon.
Thank you Trudi. I believe you are correct about this. I have to tap into what healing is going to be for me, as strange as that sounds. I’ve been trying to get help within the system for over a decade and if this is still where I am, then a new way is called for. Much love to you, and thank you for your kindness.
However I can understand your situation. I have lived with Syringomyelia for decades.
On one hand, the M.D.s state there is no cure, there is no treatment, then turn around and insist on "treatment" they just admitted, doesn't work. Treatment that only butchers you, makes things worse, makes you absolutely dependent on them for the delusion of hope.
They told me in 2006, that I wouldn't be walking within five years.
They told me repeatedly in 2007-2010, that I would be dead in, Days-weeks, etc.
It's the end of 2024.
I am walking, sucking air and looking at the Right side of the daisies.
I believe I am upright for two reasons.
The Grace of GOD, and I stopped ALL "treatment"
Some of the "treatment" was actually killing me.
Regardless.
There is hope,
It's gonna hurt, but, it's forging you into a weapon.
The hammer and fire sucks.
But you can't get a sword any other way.
GOD has you in his heart.
When it's dark remember that.
Check this out.
The battle and the forge, and the Love/Heart of GOD is what it's about.
I saw this last night and almost cried - you have a way of doing that with words, but in a good way. Thank you SO MUCH for sharing that with me. And thank you for what you said about being forged. And thank you for continuing to create beautiful music and be a channel. I am proud of you. And this story helps a lot, as a reminder to back up from the crazy making system as opposed to fighting deeper into it. I’ve gotta believe we all still have our own innate healing abilities and intelligence. You are clearly an example of this.
I gave up on allopathy years ago for precisely the reasons you state. Chronic pain for over a decade. Things I have found most helpful are ghost pipe tincture, kratom powder, and essiac tea. From genuineessiac.com
Hope any or all help Tesstamona! 💕 Pain truly does tend to suck the life right out of one.
Whew! That was quite the post, and I mean that in a complimentary way! I have a bit to say about many aspects of what you wrote but for now suffice it to say that I’m sending you all the good energy & positive vibes I’ve got. You’re not alone in your journey, and you’ve got folks who will walk along with you every step of the way. Count me in. Don’t give up, don’t give in, and don’t stop on the path toward figuring out a different way to be healthy. You got this.
Thank you so much. This warmed my heart to read yesterday. I didn’t have ability to respond back but I wanted to say thank you for your support and being a kind human being on this planet, it makes life better for everybody. Messages like these and people like you and many others on here remind me of the Love and God in this life. 🙏
Drop the mic Tesstamona...got to leave the deathcare system, it aint for health, forgot God's wisdom...don't care about health just globalism...healthcare, well, it left the building.
Thank you for writing this. More and more people are finding out. More and more people know that we have to come together to really do something about it. By being in it with one another, by building beautiful solutions together, by coming into true presence with one another.
After most of this past decade doing "Rescue Aid In Hell" — community crisis care ballooned beyond imagining by the sheer and horrific invisibility of what living beings endure at intersections of compounded medical negligence, incompetence, malfeasance, abusive professional context (as in, wow are professionals being abused in their workplaces!), and predatory commerce — we notice again and again that more voices are rising.
And there is something in us that is far more powerful than the forces of inertia and decay that would keep that status quo in place.
There are masses more of us in this together than we've even recognized yet. There's a tidal convergence. We're being carried into a big change, and all of us are needed.
In my body I hear — "SWIM!!"
It’s such a hard topic to talk about. I know you understand it very well based on our conversations, which “ironically” crossed my mind a few days before I published this.
I’ve dealt with the abysmal (abyss?) whirpool this system is so much, and for differing reasons, that I often hesitate to rehash those stories because in all honestly, I still dont feel like im “back to normal” with my health, even after 10+ years of when I decided to go that route to get help for health things.
Not to knock people who do surgeries or emergency medicine when needed, but in all other respects, more often than not, the treatment protocols given, in my experience, have exacerbated the situation or created issues where there weren’t any. Again I know you are all too familiar with this.
A new way of healing is called for, clearly. Only way I survived the last round was by fighting like hell for years on end. I’ll have to do it again but this time I won’t do it to the degree where it consumes my life. I have to return back to the simpler things I think. Hopefully this made sense, brain is still kinda foggy.
Much love to you and your community of people all going through this shit. I hope we get to meet in person one day.
There is something so incomparably powerful, I find, about wherever people experiencing these things can share really honestly about it and feel heard and recognized, feel the sense of the collective body waking to awareness of it and maintaining a consistent awareness of it, and leaning in to know the circumstance better in order to facilitate a collective response.
Having to hide what one is experiencing, having to veil what's really happening, it shuts the living body down in so many ways. It feels to me that the individual body needs to know that a collective response is possible, and it activates new functions. Pleomorphisms.
Even if that collective response is just that more and more of us know, and we remember, and we are looking out for one another. That we are not ignoring or trying to pretend away these situations. That we know that these things are happening in one another's lives — and the more awareness we have about it, the more we can suddenly realize our capacity for collaborative strategy in it. Miracles that happened just because we stayed with one another in it in whatever way we could.
So I am always looking to find who can talk about this, who is willing to share what they're experiencing about it, who is anchoring honorable human energetics for the ways we can co-create and tend community bodies that recognize this.
I have found that kind of relational contact to be so life-saving and regenerative for me and others. It's so full of vitality, that presencing and tending in recognition and relationship with one another, I think that carries the biggest healing and the biggest reparative capacities. It makes everything else work better. And sometimes it's the thing that works when nothing else does.
I feel really deeply that the more we build that, the more we will have exactly what we need, whatever that happens to be.
Yes — I so want to meet you in person one day. ✨💖✨ Thank you for your kind words. And blessings to all of this! 🙏🏼🕊️🌿
Yes! So much of this (the original post and this comment!) resonates for me, but I am especially holding this part:
“there is something in us that is far more powerful than the forces of inertia and decay that would keep that status quo in place.
There are masses more of us in this together than we've even recognized yet. There's a tidal convergence.”
🌊🌒🌕🌘💦✨
No...MD stands for Master of Death. You might look into DMSO as something for pain. I have not used it but have read good things about it.
It's a bit confusing as you say you have family members who are medical professionals and then you say there are some good doctors who really want to help people. Perhaps you have considered asking a family member for support. Seems like that would be a logical step.
I don't blame you for not trusting doctors as the system can be infuriating. And for sure many insurance companies are the pits. You might be able to find a holistic type doctor in your area and one that takes cash. I did this with my wife and her hip problems instead of having the recommended hip surgery. The results have been pretty good.
Thank you. I haven’t heard of DMSO so I will look into that. And yes, it can be very confusing and complicated on an additional level for the reason you mentioned here, the system as a whole is wildly fucked, but I have also seen those little glimpses, where truly, even in a busted system.. the light of the person who happens to also be a physician can make a big difference to the good.
It is unfortunate, because they are often blocked from doing so. Usually they’re more at liberty when in their own private practice. I hear and see this all the time. It’s rough. I wouldn’t be able to be in that system, I’d probably get into an actual fight with a hospital exec day one. And then of course, there are the ones, just like in any other “field”, where they blindly follow orders — although these orders, when blindly follow, can be fatal. Often they are. Stakes are much higher than someone who works at a grocery store.
But, I will cease my complaining. I’ll look into what you have said. And yes, I will be taking the healing in a different direction and hopefully connecting with a holistic practitioner here. Thank you for your share here. And I am glad your wife was able to find relief for what she was going through. 🙏
This is brilliantly written and also heartbreakingly true. Thank you for your persistence, your art, and your divine humanity! And thank you for acknowledging that there are providers who do actually care(I am one). We are in this together. I pray you find some relief from your pain soon, in the way that is best for *you*.
Thank you for saying something!!!! And thank you for being in the field of medicine and being one who cares. Given the things I’ve heard (and seen) from physicians, nurses, etc, I know it is not easy to be in your shoes at all. Thank you. <3
I despise the medical system in the US. It’s horrible, and frankly, it’s worse in Florida. My brother was addicted to opioids and after my parents paid for him to go to rehab twice, after the second time 8 years ago, my father drove him to Connecticut the day after he got out to live with me temporarily so he could get away from all the people and corrupt doctors who were writing prescriptions like candy. He is still here, and thriving now as a real estate agent because my little farm house in the woods helped him heal. He knows how lucky he is to have a supportive family, most of his friend’s families had disowned them. One of the biggest reasons I believe in you and support your work, Tess, is that you know that we can and do recover. More people need this mindset.
I am ANA positive, which means I have the autoimmune antibodies but have not been able to get a diagnosis. I flare up in pain and get very tired, especially when under stress. Thing with autoimmune diseases is that there is no “autoimmune doctor” so all the “specialists” just keep pointing at eachother because no one knows the answer. Mickey Trescott has a good cook book for recipes that help decrease flare ups and chronic fatigue symptoms. Being ANA positive has made me learn how to take care of myself, and I’m still learning.
I hear your pain, and I hope you can find the peace you need. I would love to talk to you about AI sometime, I don’t think it’s as scary as you do, but I understand that we fear the unknown. It’s a powerful tool, like a knife, it can be used for great good or bad deeds.
Sending you love. ❤️
Thank you so much for sharing this. I am also quite frustrated with the florida docs, however I've lived several states... I've had hellacious healthcare in Oregon as well, not sure where it's good. But I believe you, if I remember correctly, you're from the area I live in, gulf coast right?
I am so glad your brother got out and has you and your family in his life. It's a tragedy when families disown one another because of these issues (or any really).
The ANA positive - thank you for sharing that. So, I am dealing with something similar. A certain antibody associated with an "umbrella" autoimmune condition keeps coming up positive, but they cannot figure out exactly what it is or why.
I would be very interested in speaking with you about the cook book because the pain I've dealt with for such a long time absolutely flares up with certain psychological stressors / triggers.
Definitely down to talk about AI as well. Where I come from regarding AI is numerous prophecies around it that go back thousands of years, plus observing how it is used in real time, plus knowing who created it and what their motives were and still are.
I suppose it could be used for the good, but the people who currently control it are not interested in that. It's an incredibly powerful technology and I don't think the current level of consciousness on this planet is ready for it. Same reason why I wouldn't hand a grenade to a toddler.
However, I'm open to hearing your thoughts on the matter, I'd actually appreciate hearing another perspective. I'll message you my #.
I cannot imagine a system so screwed that you are judged on the type of insurance you have instead of the healing you need. What is wrong with these people? I hope you do find your way to healing. It won’t be through medical doctors. It’ll be through your own spiritual journey. I hope you find relief soon.
Thank you Trudi. I believe you are correct about this. I have to tap into what healing is going to be for me, as strange as that sounds. I’ve been trying to get help within the system for over a decade and if this is still where I am, then a new way is called for. Much love to you, and thank you for your kindness.
Preach it Sister!
I am not really much on sharing personal issues.
However I can understand your situation. I have lived with Syringomyelia for decades.
On one hand, the M.D.s state there is no cure, there is no treatment, then turn around and insist on "treatment" they just admitted, doesn't work. Treatment that only butchers you, makes things worse, makes you absolutely dependent on them for the delusion of hope.
They told me in 2006, that I wouldn't be walking within five years.
They told me repeatedly in 2007-2010, that I would be dead in, Days-weeks, etc.
It's the end of 2024.
I am walking, sucking air and looking at the Right side of the daisies.
I believe I am upright for two reasons.
The Grace of GOD, and I stopped ALL "treatment"
Some of the "treatment" was actually killing me.
Regardless.
There is hope,
It's gonna hurt, but, it's forging you into a weapon.
The hammer and fire sucks.
But you can't get a sword any other way.
GOD has you in his heart.
When it's dark remember that.
Check this out.
The battle and the forge, and the Love/Heart of GOD is what it's about.
https://donnharper.bandcamp.com/track/forever
I saw this last night and almost cried - you have a way of doing that with words, but in a good way. Thank you SO MUCH for sharing that with me. And thank you for what you said about being forged. And thank you for continuing to create beautiful music and be a channel. I am proud of you. And this story helps a lot, as a reminder to back up from the crazy making system as opposed to fighting deeper into it. I’ve gotta believe we all still have our own innate healing abilities and intelligence. You are clearly an example of this.
It ain't me.
It is GOD.
True, but you are the instrument, and the willing one. That still counts for something I’d think!
HE likes broken vessels.
I gave up on allopathy years ago for precisely the reasons you state. Chronic pain for over a decade. Things I have found most helpful are ghost pipe tincture, kratom powder, and essiac tea. From genuineessiac.com
Hope any or all help Tesstamona! 💕 Pain truly does tend to suck the life right out of one.
Thank you so much friend. I appreciate youu.
You’re very welcome Tesstamona. 💕
I'm so sorry you are suffering from so much pain. 😞
The whole time reading this I kept thinking of the New Biology Clinic. Thought I'd share if you're interested.
https://newbiologyclinic.com/#readmore
Thank you so much for sharing a resource with me. I will absolutely look into this. God bless.
Hope you get to feeling better. 🙏 You look so young and healthy even with your past experiences. 😇
Thank you, I appreciate that a lot. 🙏
Whew! That was quite the post, and I mean that in a complimentary way! I have a bit to say about many aspects of what you wrote but for now suffice it to say that I’m sending you all the good energy & positive vibes I’ve got. You’re not alone in your journey, and you’ve got folks who will walk along with you every step of the way. Count me in. Don’t give up, don’t give in, and don’t stop on the path toward figuring out a different way to be healthy. You got this.
Thank you so much. This warmed my heart to read yesterday. I didn’t have ability to respond back but I wanted to say thank you for your support and being a kind human being on this planet, it makes life better for everybody. Messages like these and people like you and many others on here remind me of the Love and God in this life. 🙏
Drop the mic Tesstamona...got to leave the deathcare system, it aint for health, forgot God's wisdom...don't care about health just globalism...healthcare, well, it left the building.