Who Are You?

The question was posed, I answered in prose:

Who are you? 
I am creation in a cage 
in the process of a jail break
melting and prying away at the bars and gate
often forgetting I have choice and 
there is no one else to blame 

I am afraid of my own light, 
but I am light 
And I am often blinded by my own shadow, 
taking so much comfort in its familiarity that I am 
akin to a fish in water,
with no idea of the concept of wetness

Desensitization and a monopoly on exposure makes one forget 

But I am 

I am not something you can destroy with the constriction of words, 
or descriptions of what it is I do, 
do you even know if I want to do 
those things I do? 

Do I? 

What do I want? Can I hear my own mind? 
Can I hear my own Signal, over the noise? 

I am one who has fought wars I often forget
until I see the horror on the faces of ones who hear me 
casually mention fractions of the stories 

I am a crosser, 
crosser of dimensions, 
while still rooted in the same physicality

I am a traveler, 
traveler of the lands geographic and, 
traveler of things you could say are 
occulted. 

I have been to the void. 
I can hear and see things I can’t explain in the ancestral realm, 
or whatever they call it. wherever it is. 
so many words for the same things, 
no wonder why we're all
so confused. 
always arguing over who is right. 
probably no one. 

I am looking for reflections and that doesn’t help 
unless you want to really sharpen and purify yourself, 
which i do 

i see selfishness all around me, 
i am disgusted by the laziness and the self-absorption, 
the deadening all around me, 

maybe its atrazine, maybe its 5G, 
but surely, no one was born with it 
distorted mirrors and AI, 
now we live in an augmented reality, 
daily microdosing our lobotomies. 

and I, 
I am the flame, the dancer, the singer, 
the laughing, the loving, the energy, 
who wants to be 
Free. 

who wants to be 
Useful 

who wants to 
Love

who wants 
Connection

who wants to TRULY 
be of Service 

and when it comes to 
Freedom, 

being useful, loving, 
connected and of service, 
those are all the same things. 

that is what it is to be Free. 

i am a traveler, 
i am a shit-kicker and self-deluder and 
constant metamorphosing monarch 
in the name of surrendering old ways 
and in acceptance of truth. 

i have the soul of a rambler who wants roots 
i am a walking contradiction in many ways 
and i suppose like all things that are 
not of this world 
they can only be experienced, never explained. 

to let oneself simply be 
is an art and a practice. 
it is a Sadhana 
all too often neglected. 

i am the caged bird that is tired of being angry. 

i am the 
canary in the coal mine 
who has found another way 
to warn the others of impending peril
without the indicator being my death. 

i have learned
not even the ultimate sacrifice
can bring about change 
when it comes to humans 
and their vice-grip
on self-sabotaging and obliterating ways 

the only thing i can do is free myself. 

i am a fighter and for reasons that even escape me 
i have never given up 
and somehow avoided 
being a statistic 

i dont say that with pride 
because most of my loved ones have died
but feeling sorry for myself that they are gone 
my roots, history, memories, 
scattered ashes in a graveyard no one remembers the location of, 
is no way to honor them or i 

so i must carry on 
i must carry on without feeling the need to apologize that i am still alive 
or that i am still sober 
or that i survived

i must carry on without ever hiding that i still fight a war most have no idea of 

connections abound and life force rushes in when i 
speak that which i am ashamed of, 
bringing witness to the shadow, 

and suddenly the shadow lessens, 
suddenly it becomes food for my engine, 
suddenly it becomes reason to propel forward in the Sun’s direction, 
toward light, toward Life,

i am one with great fear and one with great courage 
i am one with great grief and one with great Love 
i am one with great deception and one with great wisdom 
I am so much this, but I suppose I am also a bit of a, 
walking contradiction;
to the untrained eye. 

when opposites merge and 
work together to form the functional, 
in service and love motivated way forward, 
that is what they mean by a 
successful integration, 
alchemization. 

i look for reciprocity and i notice myself shy away 
from those who give me their energy often, 
what am i afraid of, why would i hide from something i want? 
am i afraid i will be trapped by them? 
as if i suddenly owe them something, 
are they luring me into another prison? 

or perhaps is it 
that i have neglected and abused and isolated myself so chronically 
that anything that is NOT of that same toxic energy 
feels frightening to what I mistakenly think is “me” 
because the EGO can only go where it is familiar 
anything new it will kick and scream 
manifesting as fight, flight or freeze
but i am not my ego. 

i am peace. i am consciousness. i am love, i am forgiveness. 
i am compassion. i am unity. i am creativity. i am sharing. 
i am singing and i am dancing, i am the unrelenting belief in absolutely anything — the inner Neptune, where all ethereal beauty and dreams are reality, 
and Grace abounds.

and i fall out of harmony with who I am often, 
every day, actually.
and i think that is why i am sad and angry. 

that is likely why it is so hard to explain who i am 
because there is much to wade through of who i am not 
that still hovers in my orbit. 

i sacrificed my addiction to nicotine, the cigarettes are gone. 
i sacrificed my addiction to all other drugs and alcohol 
a long time ago. 

now i must sacrifice my addiction to isolation and comfort zones, 
and all that is “known”
i must go to where i am terrified to go 
until i am on longer terrified at all. 

fear is often the indicator, in this strange world, of where one needs to go. 

i am dying to be free, to connect,
to belong and to thrive,
to share, to express, to be free, 
to travel, to sing, to dance, to write, 
to create, to speak, 
to connect, to illuminate, 
to be and spread fire, 
among an ocean of lanterns,

while i grapple with the fear of being seen. 

while i grapple with the fear of 
failing 
while i grapple with the fear of 
not being good enough 

while i grapple with all these delusions, 
or rather, programmed messages 
that i have adopted and long since hypnotized myself with 
confusing them for reality or even 
my own beliefs. 

if you repeat something enough, 
you’ll think you came up with it, 
you’ll confuse it for truth. 

there is a big difference between truth and repetition. 
thats where school fucked everyone the most. 

sometimes correlated, but always requiring a deeper look, 
often used as tool of deception, 
things are almost never what they seem.

but who am I, you ask? 

We know none of us are our names, 
we are not what we do, 
we are not where we are from 
or what we think we know, 
we are not only the flesh, 
we are not only the spirit, 

Who are we? 
Who am I?

I am fire with mischievous and innocent motivation, in process of a prison break. 

Who are you? 

This stream of consciousness poetry/prose was inspired by the question posed in this video of Bob Proctor. To be clear, I have no idea who Bob Proctor is. Someone shared this on instagram. I saw the subtitles of the first question being posed and immediately started writing.

Apparently I’m about to find out who Bob Proctor is now. Regardless of who he is, the question is one worth asking… possibly the most important question there is to ask; surely one cannot make much of a beginning toward truth if one cannot begin to answer that.