"I Have A Dream" - An 11 Year Old Essay I Found That Might Help You
If you've lost sight of why you're alive, read this.
The fact that these papers have been traveling with me through several interstate relocations over the last 11 years, undetected until today, is not something to be overlooked. So, I am sharing it with you.
I wrote this January 11th, 2012. I was in community college at the time, had gotten sober two years prior, and was in a grant writing class to apply for tuition scholarships.
“Essay 1 Notes”
(So apparently this wasn’t the essay) -
I have a dream. This is about taking our lives back. This is about being alive. I dream of the pursuit of freedom from fear. I dream of a raw unifying honesty expressed in creativity.
In my dream, this creative force is music. We all have a story to tell, we all have pain. As humans, we live our lives guarded and distanced from each other, often feeling alone in our struggles. This music is about shattering that lie and discovering we are not unique in our suffering, but rather bound together by human experience.
This project is about shedding ego based facades and bringing justice to those victimized by silent suffering. This dream is about having the courage to get real, and empowering others to do the same.
***
When the patients in treatment first come in, they are either consumed with anger or completely withdrawn. They feel overwhelmed, confused and hopeless. Their guilt and shame of the past smothers any thoughts of the future.
Once they start talking and learn that there are others out there who have been in their shoes and now live a happy sober life, they tend to open up and have hope. When these women leave treatment, they have faith, courage and a support group. They don’t have to be alone anymore.
Being part of their support system is one of the greatest privileges I have ever known. These women transcend their demons and become loving productive members of society. For the first time in their lives, they are sober and present for their children, giving them what they so desperately need - a mother.
Those sound like two short essay (notes) in one - I was applying for scholarships at the time and having to explain the “why” of what I was doing.
What I was doing was both working in substance abuse detox clinics, residential treatment centers for women and children, and making music.
Those were my two passions. I never knew how I’d merge them.
I guess that was a reminder, because we lose sight of our “why” very easily in this world.
I know how to merge those two things now.
The point of sharing this is: If anyone has forgotten their “why” of why they are here, find it, because we all have one.
The second is:
If you have your “why” but don’t know how it’ll materialize, have faith and trust the process - as lame as that sounds, it’s often in the roads you’d never expect that you find your way to where you want to be.
The stubbornness and rigid thinking of “it needs to look exactly like this” can be an endless timewasting downfall - speaking from experience.
It took 12+ years, but I did arrive at that place. Had a handful of trials to face so I as a person could be ready to take something like that on.
We have to be able to match the caliber of our goals / dreams / purpose. Sometimes when we think we’re dealing with setbacks, we’re actually “dealing with” preparation and training.
