Another Lesson From Death, But Not What You'd Expect.

This is about the tornados in the South last night, and what happened as I watched the sky turn green.

This is why we Memento Mori 

Choosing to sit outside and watch tornados approach as opposed to take cover was a weird move. But that’s what I did last night.

People lost their lives, things went sideways, I’ll explain. 

I don’t know where you’re reading from, I live in Tennessee. You might have heard about the tornados in the southeast last night that killed upwards of 25 people. The worst of it, including the (I believe it is now 26) deaths, were in Mississippi.

Some people around here are used to people randomly getting sucked into the sky. Tornados are a part of life here.

Others, like me, cannot believe this shit happens. 

FIRST OFF before I go any further, I don’t know anyone who lost their lives in the storm last night, but a moment of pause, silence, and prayer goes out to everyone affected. I do not want to just breeze past that.

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In disclosing some behind the scenes shit from last nights events, I’m gonna share some personal stuff, shit that I haven’t bothered telling anyone, because it’s easier to communicate vulnerable things through a device than in real life, let’s be honest.

Also I was literally faced with my greatest fear, and no, it was not a tornado, and no, it was not the thought of dying.

I was at work late, and I started getting texts about a tornado coming my way. 

I checked the weather, nothing but severe thunderstorm warnings. I thought the person was just being dramatic or getting wrong news; it wasn’t windy, and nothing on my phones weather app signaled it. 

The person texting me doesn’t live in Tennessee. How weird it is, that someone in another state thousands of miles away would be getting better weather intel than the people directly in the line of tornados?

Don’t get me started. 

By the time I got home, I got a phone call saying it had gotten worse, and the news was saying it was 15 minutes from hitting Nashville.

They weren’t completely wrong, my entire drive home the storm got worse and I was watching lightning bolts touch the ground all around me. The wind still wasn’t a concern though. This was just a storm in the south.

Then I hear objects from outside banging into my apartment building (I live in old apartments, not a large complex, its only 8 units to a building, so you will hear stuff like that) and thats when I started to get a little nervous. 

I go to YouTube and check out the Ryan Hall Yall channel, where he always livestreams severe weather and has a team of tornado chasers. A friend here in Tennessee put me on to his channel when I was worried about, well, this scenario. 

I’ve watched a lot of Ryans livestreams during severe weather outbreaks. I’d never seen him that concerned. It was bad. I watched in real time as Mississippi got destroyed. 

Still nothing from the actual national weather service. 

He was begging people to contact their loved ones who were, at that time of night, likely asleep, and to wake them up, because they were in the line of the storm. 

Hopefully that saved someone. 

I knew it was headed our way. The storm was getting louder. So… I decided to go outside. 

I sat on a covered balcony in a folding chair and just watched the light show. Rain, constant lightning and thunder, I knew there were no tornado shelters anywhere near me, and there certainly is no place to hide within these apartment buildings. I am also on the top floor, so there is no getting to low ground.

Tornados are more of a “if it’s your time to go, its your time to go” thing for me. I may be a prepper for many SHTF scenarios, but at the moment, tornados are not one of them.

If one of them comes my way, I’m alright with it. Let it take me away, or let it pass over. I leave that up to the universe, or geo-engineering, whatever it is. 

Either way, I’m not too attached is what I’m saying. 

The storm progressed and then I saw something I’d never seen before. When lightning flashed, the entire sky turned green. It happened so many times. That’s when I was like… FUCK. 

I knew from people who’d been through tornados that when they happen, the sky turns green. 

That scared the shit out of me, I’ll be real. 

Not because I thought I was going to die though. 

There was another reason that it disturbed me, and honestly, I would rather have the fear of death than the devastating realization of what I did.

To be honest it’s kind of dark, and I am not super comfortable disclosing it publicly, but I’m going to for the purpose of it maybe helping someone.

However, I’m going the halfway road with this.

There are paid subscribers on this substack, and there are free subscribers. There are more free subscribers than there are paid, so to reduce audience size and therefore my anxiety in disclosing this stuff, I am making the rest of this story for paid subscribers only.

This also prevents random people on the internet who aren’t subscribers at all (or ones that do know me that I do NOT want reading it) from seeing it as well.

I don’t know if I’ll ever talk about this, maybe in the future once I’ve implemented the lessons I got hit with into action, but right now it feels a bit raw. 

Alright, much love if this is where your reading journey ends, if you are a paid subscriber I’ll see you at the next sentence.